The Geek shall inherit the Earth
Yes… I admit it… I’m a Geek.
It does irk me however that this is used within conversation in a derogatory manner… right up until your Phone, Computer or Satellite TV stops working – then suddenly I’m your best friend, your saviour, your Bonne Amie.
Here (in no particular order) are just a few of the technical support and user issues I’ve recently encountered. I’ve removed the names to save them from being mortally embarrassed.
Can’t get DVD, TV or Sky to work
After a cursory look behind the TV and its improbably expensive surround-sound system I noticed that the HDMI ‘Out’ on the Surround sound system was connected to the ‘In’ on the same box…Doh!
Oh no! My computer is infected with a Virus
After spending 3 hours the week before cleaning a friends PC, exactly the same thing happened again. “How did it happen”, I asked. “Well… I opened an email from FedEx and it said to look at the attachment….” After a facepalm moment from me, I got clarification that a) He opened the attachment [a .zip file] and ran the executable and b) He wasn’t actually expecting any parcel from FedEx in any case!
Careful what the Grandchildren might see…
The Father of a friend of mine likes ‘exotic’ websites… unfortunately he doesn’t get that every time he clicks on ‘Like’, it posts on his Facebook profile that “[name redacted] likes [insert particular perversion here]“. This wouldn’t be so bad if he wasn’t Facebook Friends with his Children and Grandchildren.
It seems that almost everyone I know can’t remember their Wireless key. The net effect is that whenever they get a new computer, they phone me (yes… muggins here normally has to get the router working in the first place…) to ask what their key is! Luckily this one is easily resolved as I’ve set *all* my friends routers to use the same password – maybe not that secure I know… but damn convenient when I’m visiting ;o)
OMG our system is down and we can’t received any calls! [this call arrived at 5:25 on a Friday]
“Ok, we will get an engineer to you on Monday morning”, I said to them. “NO! We must have them here tomorrow”, was the swift reply. After some wrangling the customer agreed to pay a £700 call-out fee for an engineer to go to London on a Saturday morning. Upon arriving, the problem was quickly diagnosed as “Cleaner unplugged PC to plug in vacuum cleaner”.
If all else fails, you can rely on the Police…
One of our customers, the [redacted] Police Force had an issue where data wasn’t being received from one of their remote Police stations. Upon visiting the site it became clear that the reason they were not receiving any data was that the equipment that should have been sending it had been stolen from the locked maintenance room in which it was located.